Dwayne Blogged

Time In Your Hands

2011-11-29T05:47:00.000-08:00

Time is so precious. And it always presents choices. I believe there truly isn’t enough time to do everything (especially if you want to do everything). So the choices become really important. It’s not that I think lying in bed and staring at the ceiling is a waste of time either. Because sometimes that’s necessary. My main question is: How are you allocating your time?

I find that we are easily distracted by our present. It is essential to occasionally step out of where we are and look at the bigger picture. While focused on the many tasks ahead of us and by completing each one as fast as we can, we may feel like we’re actually doing something fruitful and worthwhile and that may be so, but if you really step out of it.. you may gain better perspective on priorities.

For example, if I’m an animator and I have to convert 2D animation into 3D having to manually work on every single strand of hair on some animal’s body, I might find that at the end of it, I have the satisfaction of feeling good about the fruits of my labour. However, if this animator (with a supposed luxury of time) maybe waited till technology allowed for a faster process or worked on creating that technology himself then that would have been time more wisely spent no?

This may not be the best example. I really don’t know the answers and I’m only just sorting this out in my head but I’m thinking that that is closer to how I should think in terms of how I spend my time anyway. For me, family, friends, career, self and giving back come to mind. Thoughts?

Shapeshifting Singapore

2011-09-11T10:32:00.000-07:00

As a country Singapore is only 45 years old. It's crazy to think we've evolved so quickly to even successfully putting ourselves on the world map (although I still meet people who think Singapore's in China). As I watch Singapore change before my eyes, my biggest question is "What IS the Singaporean identity?"

Here are bits of information I found after some casual research on the internet. 1) 1000 Singaporeans renounce their citizenship every year. 2) There are 150,000 Singaporeans living abroad. 3) Without immigrants, Singapore's population will decline. 4) As of July 2010, Singapore's population hit the 5 million mark. About 3.2 are Singapore residents, 0.5 permanent residents and 1.3 non-permanent residents. The foreign population has seen a dramatic increase in the past two years.

Singapore is consequentially in the process of a huge shift. Cost of living has gone up. She is the second most densely populated independent country in the world. Here are some of my own observations. I hear many foreign kids in local schools speaking with strong Singlish inflections. Will these children stay and be part of the new Singaporean identity? How will Singlish evolve because of foreign influence and with Senior Minister Lee's stamp of approval on American English? Food, culture, art.. everything is set to evolve and fast. Is this speedy change good? Or will Singapore lose its distinctiveness as she opens her arms to the world?

Where My Imagination Feels Small

2011-03-27T11:25:00.000-07:00

There are many instances presented to my life lately where I consider my rather creative and skillful imagination limited. The one thing similar in all these instances are the high stakes and heightened reality. Most of us are lucky and sheltered and will unlikely ever experience such situations; the end of a relationship, financial struggles, stress at work, an argument with a friend are all difficult, but still a fraction of intensity from these situations which I hope never to be a part of.

The recent earthquake and tsunami combines the worst possible scenarios - loss of loved ones, one’s home and possessions after surviving a catastrophic disaster while battling the cold weather, thirsty and hungry, and vulnerable to the possible effects of harmful radiation is unimaginable to me.

I actually watched the movie “Aftershock” right before it happened and it has helped in bringing me emotionally closer to understanding what those victims went through. I recently saw “127 Hours” too, about a man though accidentally trapped in a canyon, managed to overcome all the obstacles he faced through sheer determination and strength. There is something to be learnt from these survivors. These lessons will hopefully never be presented to us. And we shouldn’t need for them to to learn how to tackle life with such steely grit.

There are many unsung survivors out there - people battling illness, waiting to receive an organ, the list goes on. When you recognize them, please show them as much compassion and generosity as you can because unless you’ve experienced it yourself, you won’t know what exactly they must be going through.

iHeartMyFriends

2011-03-15T10:26:00.000-07:00

The last time I blogged about an electronic product, I talked about my iPhone 3GS and how it improved my life. In fact, I love it so much I decided to buy the new MacBook Pro (featuring quad-core Intel Core i7)! So far, it’s been a life saver. I recently gathered a group of amazing and willing friends to help read out a musical I wrote. I had some problems attaching my MP3 player to the stereo. But it was easily solved by burning a quick CD of the song files that were also in my Mac. The music played on the stereo without a hitch!

I also considered recording the read on my iPhone but luckily, one of my friends suggested using iMovie on the Mac. For a tiny camera, it really captured a wide berth and in high definition nonetheless. The microphone also picked up people from a pretty good distance, but of course it helped that the room was quiet. I have to say, I am learning and loving iMovie. It’s inspired me to make more videos. Expect some great new edits on my YouTube channel!

Playing World of Warcraft is also fantastic on the Mac. Graphics are rendered more smoothly than on my PC, granted my PC is three years older. I got a spunky Razer Naga Special Molten Edition mouse to go with it. Sexy!! Also got a new pair of headphones with microphone. Only problem here was the Mac’s Line In port is not meant for a microphone. Bummer! The Mac does have a built-in microphone with an “ambient noise reduction” function.

All in all, I would say as a PC user converting to a Mac, it wasn’t too difficult. And what the Mac has over the PC is style. It’s classy. Environmentalists will also be happy to know that it’s made from recyclable aluminium and has a mercury-free energy-efficient LED-backlit display made from arsenic-free glass. As of March 11th, iPhone has also released the new OS 4.3. The new Personal Hotspot function works perfectly with the MacBook Pro to provide Bluetooth internet tethering. Thumbs up Apple! What’s next for me? The iPad 2? We’ll see.

The Disconnect Of Online

2011-02-09T04:50:00.000-08:00

A couple sits at a dinner table but they are playing Words With Friends on their iPhones - with each other nonetheless. A member of the audience in a US cinema is text messaging his friend in Singapore about a movie that hasn’t been released there yet. A boy in front of his computer has one conversation taking place on Facebook, another on MSN and yet another in Google Chat.

What has meant to connect us has seemingly disconnected us more than ever before. I guess it’s arguable. And there is a certain convenience to how connected we’ve become. Yet I’ve personally hit a point where there are too many things competing for my attention because of this convenience, so much so that I have very few moments left in a day which actually have my undivided attention. I suspect I’m probably not the only one.

If I might venture to add, this has translated into a new acceptable behaviour of sorts; where it’s okay to make your friend wait while you finish off a text message; where you can juggle so many conversations, it’s not expected of you to reply right away or even on the same day anymore; where strangers in a virtual chat can ignore your friendliest hello without consequence or their own conscience nagging at them.

As the lines between real and virtual blur, there are choices to be made if we want a firmer grip on what it really means to connect.

Do I Know You?

2010-12-30T03:47:00.000-08:00

If you have a favourite celebrity, chances are he or she has become someone who is very familiar to you, like a friend almost. Yet to that celebrity, you are a complete stranger. Strange isn’t it? And even stranger… I recently met a girl who saw an episode of a show I was on. I was sure I wasn’t her favourite celebrity, yet she behaved like she knew me. It threw me off. I happened to be with a friend she knew and the whole time she was just staring and smiling at me. She seemed very comfortable but I was completely awkward.

It’s a funny thing… to think you know someone. I know you because you’ve been on TV. I know you because we have great chemistry. I know you because we have mutual friends. I know you because you are my reflection. How well do we really know the people around us, much less ourselves? Which leads to how much do we really reveal about ourselves?

I lost my brother in October. I realised how much I didn't know him until after his death. Circumstances made me have to read some of his messages to people, sort through his favourite music on his music player and meet his friends. I learnt many new things about him. Part of what I'm saying is don't wait till someone is gone to realise you didn't make the time or effort to get to know a person. The other part of it is, sometimes people don't necessarily reveal to you everything about themselves and that's just the way things are. But the bigger question is... do you know who YOU are? Have you taken the time to understand yourself? And are there things you feel you should share to the people who matter? Don't rob yourself of these chances.

Por Favour

2010-08-29T04:38:00.001-07:00

The phrase "I owe you one!" is commonly used because people feel obliged to return a favour. Favours are very interesting things. From my experience, it can get rather complicated. Does it mean I avoid asking for favours? I really try not to but no man is an island, and at some point everyone could use a favour or two.

Unfortunately, different people have different ideas about favours. "I owe you one" is definitely a common standard. And that's okay. After all, psychologists believe people aren't naturally altruistic. But when it comes down to performing a favour, it's difficult to determine where the line is drawn.

Some people agree to favours but lack the commitment so the quality of the favour suffers. Other favours aren't clearly spelt out in the beginning and can grow into an enormous task. Resentment and the breakdown of friendships can result. Personally, I think twice about asking for a favour or doing one. And it's always best to definite them clearly and only commit to them if you can ensure it won't be half-assed (sorry couldn't think of a better word). If you can't commit... don't do it.

When was the last time you did someone a favour in the true sense of the word and not expected anything in return? Try it! If everyone looked at favours that way, there would be no awkward obligation to return them. But of course don't take them for granted.

Types of Stereo

2010-06-26T07:40:00.000-07:00

Stereotypes have been discussed to death. They definitely help to make sense of the world around us. But sometimes they can also impair our judgment and no matter how we try not to be influenced by them, most of us find difficulty steering clear. I've got a kind of blues I term as 'The Little Boy Blues'... sort of a Dorian Gray syndrome almost. I look younger than I actually am. For a good part of my life it was okay but lately it's proving to be challenging.

While trying to visit a friend, I was recently stopped on my way into some residential property. The guard at his post beckoned me demeaningly with a finger. After I listened to him tell me it was private property and that I shouldn't just walk in, I told him I was an invited guest that did not see any sign to 'check in'.

I was quite sure that if I were an elderly man, a sexy girl or more formally dressed he would have treated me with more respect. Nonetheless, I sucked it in and explained that his post was poorly positioned in the middle of the road and that it didn't look like I could talk through the seamless glass that covered the front of his booth. He was insistent and told me it was common knowledge that in Singapore you always have to stop by the guard post.

That was it! I refused to be talked down to so I let him have it and told him that no matter what, a visitor still deserves to be treated with respect and not beckoned like a dog. When he realised I was not the little pushover boy that I looked, he finally apologized.

Don't let people pidgeonhole you. Stand your ground and put THEM back in their place. Even if you have to roar surround sound.

Becoming Ms. Powell

2010-06-05T06:38:00.000-07:00

I've started to have a new interest in food. That could be THE turning point for a skinny guy like me. Let's hope. Since my domestic helper left, I've been forced to explore a little more since food wasn't going to magically appear when I was hungry or be waiting at home at the end of the day.

My steady job at Universal Studios has also given me the chance to pamper myself a little more and in the process, revive my palate. I used to think I had a poor appetite and wondered how people could eat so much even when they were full. Now I know it's just that I have expensive taste. Boy! Put good food in front of me and I become a bottomless pit. I recently ate at two great places in one day. Marché at Vivo City Singapore is a delightful haven of festive food fare (paella pictured right). They've improved their selection too, since their move from the Heeren. Fiesta at the Festive Hotel at Resorts World Singapore has perfected Brazilian fine dining to a tee (appetizer pictured far right).

A recent musical presentation (pictured far above) about food also inspired me to get my own hands dirty in the kitchen. I found my way to the monthly Farmers' Market at Loewen Gardens (in the rain) and bought some gigantic organic mushrooms. Back home, I searched the internet for the best way to store them, stored them, took a short nap, watched a "how to make mushroom soup video" on YouTube and made my most favourite mushroom soup to date! Voila... I've become a mini Julie Powell from "Julie and Julia" - blogging and all.

Falling In Place

2010-05-20T05:19:00.001-07:00

Things are better now. I'm able to speak my mind freely without feeling guilty about it and still remain the generous guy that I thought I couldn't be anymore if I decided to be a firmer person. I recently watched "Food Inc" and am reading "Blink" by Malcolm Gladwell. I recommend both for the new perspectives I've gained. I can't begin to summarize everything about the movie and the book here, but I can share my thoughts.

Most of us have lived our lives in our small bubbles without really being aware of many things. What we don't realize is that more and more we can break out of this bubble, with awareness. Because with that awareness comes empowerment. This day and age has given us the tools to think and act for ourselves. But with it comes a huge responsibility - to ourselves, humanity and the environment. Don't just go with the flow. That's not living life.

Take a step back every once a while. Question things. Where does my food come from? What am I supporting when I buy this food? Am I feeding my body what it really needs? Where does my trash go? How is it affecting the earth? How am I able to buy this item at such a low price? Who else paid for it and how did they pay for it? You'll be surprised how these answers will affect you. I read recently that my favourite actor Jason Scott Lee only spends eight thousand dollars a year and he is totally happy.

Where The Grass Is Greener

2010-05-04T02:59:00.000-07:00

I used to sit on the fence a lot. It was my favourite seat. It gave me perspective. It gave me options. Sitting on spikes was a small price to pay. But lately, I've been playing on the side where the grass is greener and it is starting to scare me. I can't decide if I'm devouring the green grass or if I'm nurturing it.

I've lost two important people in my life. Betrayal might be too strong a word for it, so let's just say it falls somewhere between that and unfaithfulness. Also, my maid of 24 years recently left the household. The family has been so used to having her around the transition hasn't been easy. But whatever the case, I've been forced off the fence - forced to toughen up or sink in helplessness. I've chosen to be tough.

However, with my new attitude, I can't decide if I'm actually standing up for what I believe in or finding fault in others. Take for example a bus load of people who refuse to move to the back so that others can get in. People can be so insensitive. Why should I have any more tolerance for it? I know I come from a good place when I yell at them (Yes, I did). But it also makes me feel like a monster. What does a person do? I can't decide which is more painful - sitting back on the spikes of the fence or looking in the mirror and seeing a monster. HELP!

iKnowtoomuch

2010-03-21T11:14:00.000-07:00

Technology is life changing. My external hard drive crashed. Many scanned documents, pictures and music... lost. I guess that's not one benefit of going CD free or paperless. Losing everything can be quite life changing. For now, I'll hang on to my drive. Maybe one day, data recovery won't cost between $400 - $2000. Western Digital... I shake my fist at you!

I also got an iPhone. It's amazing how it empowers you. I don't even need to get out of bed to check my emails first thing in the morning AND I give my deltoids a workout too! I can even turn up at the bus stop just in time for my bus because now I'll know when it's coming. I also have a dictionary and a pocket piano for perfect pitch. The recorder records very decent audio too! Screaming Adam Lambert fans at his concert didn't sound distorted at all! That's the true test of recording equipment.

The scary part is that it encourages you to leave traces of yourself everywhere. I update my Facebook status and tweet more often now, telling people what I'm doing and where I am. There's less and less of an excuse not to reply to someone sooner. I also find myself more consistently distracted and having to multitask more. However, it's something I'm actually getting good at, having the experience of more intense multitasking anyway, from playing World of Warcraft. All things considered, the iPhone is definitely here to stay - in my life at least.

(All pictures here are taken courtesy of my iPhone)

Sense Makes Cents

2010-02-23T09:01:00.001-08:00

The way music gets to consumers has changed so much, reshaping the music industry to a large extent. Techonology has presented many ways for us to obtain music through copying, sharing and downloading - among other means. Record stores have dwindled significantly. Artists face new challenges in order to survive in the business. Independent artists are emerging stronger than before and competing head-on with artists who have labels.

To recapture the market, companies have had the sense to venture into online sales, even making songs available individually and earning by the cent. In Singapore however, the laws governing music distribution are slightly complicated. We aren't able to download from iTunes or Amazon.com. I hadn't even noticed until recently. Because if I wanted to listen to a song, I would simply hop on to YouTube, even if I had it on CD. YouTube is just that much more convenient.

In some form or other, I'm sure we're all aware of these changes. They've actually prompted me into some action. I recently walked by a CD shop and thought how sad it would be if none existed anymore. To me, browsing in a store is a much richer experience than browsing online. Five CDs caught my eye (Glee volumes 1 and 2, Adam Lambert, Kris Allen, Beyonce). I had been entertained by their music but hadn't paid a cent in show of support. It was time. I also picked up Madonna's latest compilation even though I already had most of her music on CD. I paid for the music knowing I was keeping my favourite artists alive and ensuring that one music store would last that much longer.

One Way of Looking At It

2010-01-27T05:36:00.000-08:00

The frantic me described in the previous entry has settled. The new year has approached. Some important people in my life have taken a back seat. Other friendships have hit new levels. I'm learning how to sing almost all over again. And at work, preparations for the opening of the park (Universal Studios Singapore) has been challenging. I almost want to say I'm a different person now, but I believe an evolved person is the right term.

So far, I'm proud to learn that I'm a lot stronger than I thought I was and yet, I haven't lost my sensitive side. I like the evolved me and I'm looking forward to this year.

I am excited for the many more things to learn. I am nervous for the challenges coming up in some of my friends' lives. I am hopeful for some of my dreams. I am eager to meet "me" at the end of the year. I am open. And I am thankful for life.

Obstacles Are Opportunities And A Magic Carpet Ride

2009-12-21T11:05:00.000-08:00

What is stressing me out most now is that in every situation I automatically aim towards making the most of it by preparing for it sometimes and thinking hard through it as I react to it and make quick good choices. This only happened to me recently. I'm sure it's because of improvisational workshops with my co-actors. It has helped me to think on my feet, articulate and also receive (listen) better.

I'm the kind of guy who has MANY ideas. Before, I wasn't able to manage them. But now that I have this new ability, it's actually proving to be quite taxing on the brain. Plus I'm type A personality and also obsessive compulsive. What I need to learn now is to decide when I should switch off. I've also come up with this new philosophy which I personally believe is the key to my happiness and fulfillment - which is to turn obstacles into opportunities. And this has worked fairly well.

Take a recent event at the Esplanade Concert Hall. From attending Lea Salonga's concert in New York and missing out on a chance to live my dream and sing A Whole New World with her, I made it happen for myself when she finally came to Singapore to perform. I urge everyone to do the same. I've been interviewed by a fellow blogger and will post the link in comments when the article/interview is out.

Animation Asia Conference 2009

2009-11-20T11:53:00.001-08:00

Thanks to an invite from my friend "Al", I was able to be at the first Animation Asia Conference ever! This precedes the Animation Festival Asia on Nov 21st and 22nd. The delegates (it was an honour to be considered one) attended a full day of speeches, presentations, panel discussions, interviews, great food and networking. It was an definite eye opener for me.

Japanese animation came up a lot because that's huge in the animation market. Some of the presentations were even in Japanese. I saw snippets of some of the series that I voiced and thought to myself, "Hey! I guess I have played a small part in the industry" - though I really do hope to play a bigger part with the animated feature I wrote. I was inspired by some of the success stories and wanted to meet some of the speakers. It was all rather intimidating for me because I'm more an actor than a businessman. But I figured it takes a certain amount of courage to be an actor right? And courage is courage, so I eventually mustered enough to collect and give out some business cards. Did I mention I went out and printed business cards for the event?

If nothing else, it was an inspiring day and I learnt a lot about consumer trends, the animation market and the business perspective on animation. Thank you "Al"!

An Online Presence

2009-10-20T09:40:00.000-07:00

I've been behaving like it's the end of the world. That's not the same as the end of my freelancing career, is it? I mean, I'll just never have a three month break again that's all - one week if I'm lucky! And why would I want to spring-clean my room during any of these upcoming breaks? Exactly! Which leaves only now to do it. So you can imagine how much my room looks like a warzone at the moment.

Oh no! What other things should I start doing now? Convert all those VHS tapes and cassette tapes digitally? Scan all the paper I have so that I can free up more space? But wait! Would it be too late to learn something new? Brushing up on my French or learning how to paint or draw better would be cool, right? Or cook! No, no... I need to finish editing my novel 'cos I won't have the luxury to write anymore. Why don't I just try do EVERYTHING then? Hang on! I'm not going to be in different plays and musicals anymore. Will I fade into oblivion?

Okay, deep breath! Here's what I managed to achieve. I cleaned up most of my room and made some space. I scanned a good portion of paper. I watched some French movies. I didn't get to painting/drawing or digitizing music/videos. But I finished editing my novel! I'm going to pay some money to get it professionally formatted and edited, then I'll publish it! Meanwhile click here for sample chapters. I also learnt how to produce my own YouTube videos! Who says I'm fading into oblivion. It's the perfect way to express myself creatively.

Reason For Life

2009-09-22T05:29:00.000-07:00

I had been feeling listless the past few weeks. I never understood how people got bored. "There's so much to do and no time for it!" I'd always tell them. But yet I managed to slip into boredom and I couldn't shake it off for the longest time or figure it out. I couldn't find any fault with my life. I was occupied acting in a play. I also had enough free time to do whatever I pleased, like reading or watching movies. I had many jobs offers for the following year. But somehow I wasn't motivated to do anything. I had a few suspicions on why this was so. Perhaps life wasn't challenging anymore. There was nothing left to fight for. Perhaps I felt lonely.

Then a few things happened at once that jolted me out of my jaded stupor. On the last night of my play, I saw how everyone had genuinely connected to each other and were also trying to tell me how much they had enjoyed working with me. That touched me. Their sincerity shattered the spell. Suddenly I felt strangely alive again.

I chanced upon a video on YouTube (see above) and it also allowed me to step out of my small bubble and realize a bigger picture. The video was the final piece in a jigsaw that answered how I should live a huge part of my life. Now I have a different philosophy towards how I spend, what I choose to spend on, what I really want to keep, where I put what I don't want, what organisations I will support... This has in turn made me happier living with the informed choices I can make.

I'm still not exactly sure how everything that has happened has directly caused my switch in attitude. My guess is that it has to do with seeing examples of people who are sincerely passionate about something. Now I can go back to being passionate about the things that I'm usually passionate about again.

Manhood

2009-08-15T06:37:00.000-07:00

It has been such a self-discovery working on my current play. I enjoy working on productions like this, but they don't come often. This particular one is about Manhood. It's the latest offering from Action Theatre to be staged from Sept 9-19 this year. It examines the definitions of a man from all perspectives... well, as many as we could put into a show.

We have such a great team of people - only four actors, Lim Yu Beng, Claude Girardi, Josephine Tan and myself. Our brilliant director Samantha Scott-Blackhall has allowed for very open discussions in rehearsals and Desmond Sim, the writer, has been very generous with script changes as well.

All in all, I expect it to be a very entertaining evening for everyone. I've learnt so much about myself and my own attitudes about men. About how different and yet similar we actually are. Okay, I'm starting to get philosophical. Just come watch the show for yourself and let us provoke and entertain you with penis jokes, what we think about women, being gay in a straight world, being a father and everything else that men have trouble talking about openly.

Declutter

2009-07-27T06:04:00.000-07:00

Whenever life slows down a little, I tell myself it's a much deserved break. But too often I'm reminded of the list of things I have to "catch up" on - reading, movies, friends, clearing emails, organising digital pics, etc. Have I ever caught up with everything? Never.

It occurred to me that I had to make some firm choices if I desired to make better use of my time and only deal with what I really wanted or needed to deal with. My life would be simpler that way.

I guess it has to do with greed. I keep everything and anything that has the slightest ounce of sentimental value or that might be of potential use. It's only natural. But I'm beginning to think that the gatekeeping can be done much earlier on. After all, how much can we take with us to our graves?

I'm not saying we should go against our human desires, throw out everything, ditch our friends and all be robots without souls, in the effort to make the most of time. I still want to enjoy the experience of learning, possessing something of value, being entertained, engaging in idle chatter - all those things. But I want to do it selectively.

Now, as I sort through videos, pictures, magazines, paper, I store the ones I want to keep digitally. I'm less keen in receiving tangible (worse still: ornamental gifts). Some day I plan to give or sell the collector items I own. One day I hope to grow the food I eat, only use the water I collect and consume the energy generated from my solar-panelled roof. This simplifying one's life philosophy also agrees with the environment. It can't be too bad a thing.

When Words Kill

2009-07-01T06:54:00.000-07:00

In April alone this year it was reported that two youths took their own lives. Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, an 11-year-old child, hung himself. Eric Mohat, a 17-year-old, put a gun to his head. These boys are victims of bullying.

Carl and Eric were specifically teased by their peers for being gay, even though there wasn't significant proof that they were. But the point isn't whether or not they were gay. The point is that bullying should not be tolerated or neglected. And it is everyone's responsibility.

There have been other cases. Eighth grader Lawrence King was shot and killed by a fellow student. Matthew Shepard was tortured and murdered at the age of 21. They were all victims of gay-related hate crimes.

The fight for equality isn't specific to just gender or race. It's about each human being having the right to live as an equal. We all deserve that.

Here's Hilary Duff and Wanda Sykes with a message:

And the cast on HAIR on Broadway with another:

Idolatry

2009-06-07T04:55:00.000-07:00

The stage lights dim and the curtain falls. The performer slips out of his persona and comes into contact with the real world again. I'm feeling double that effect - now that the two shows I was in have come to a close. As the routine of show schedules trickle away, I am able to look once again from outside in, at showbiz.

Yesterday, I walked past the audition for the third season of Singapore Idol. Four thousand people were in line waiting for their voices to be heard.

Many years back, I stood in that line. What is it about the stage that draws people? The fame? The attention? Like me, many others have had their turn to seduce people into voting for them. What's happened to them now? What's happened to me?

If nothing else, it was a good learning opportunity. My only

hope was for those people in line to take away as many positives from the experience as possible. Nothing else is guaranteed, not especially fame. Fame is too fleeting. It only sticks around if you feed it relentlessly. News is like pastry. It's only good for about a day.

Am I bitter? Hell no! I'm still lucky enough to be performing on stage. But I don't do it for the votes or the judges (least of all the unconstructive Singaporean ones) or to be adored. I do it to communicate - to tickle, entertain, motivate, share and discover (among other good reasons). Any recognition would be a bonus. Any of these pictures of me ring a bell? Didn't think so! ;P

Much Ado About A Book, A Fox and Nothing

2009-05-11T02:44:00.000-07:00

You might pardon me for not blogging all this time if you hear me out. Between the last blog entry and this one, I've written/typed at least 60,000 words. Yup, I wrote a book. I haven't published it yet (or found a publisher) and I won't until I've had a trusted group of people read and edit it. I'll be sure to post updates here nonetheless.

In any case, that's on hold for now because after a three month sabbatical, I've eagerly put myself in a situation I haven't been in for a long time - being in two shows that will run concurrently. It is proving to be somewhat trying at times but I do thrive when I'm busiest. So if you can and would like to, catch The Singapore Repertory Theatre's Much Ado About Nothing by Shakespeare performed at Fort Canning Park, Singapore running from May 7th till the end of the month with a possible extension. Also check out Roald Dahl's Fantastic Mr. Fox from May 18th till the end of the month, by Players Theatre.

In the meantime, stay healthy and keep a safe distance from that swine flu.

Master of None?

2009-03-10T02:41:00.000-07:00

Some people believe humans were once apes. If that were true, then evolution began even further back from now. We've certainly come a long way. Evolving beyond just physical attributes, we built communities and developed new technology. This was simultaneous to yet another evolution - an intrinsic one. We found religion and art and discovered what they did for our souls.

Today, with the power to access knowledge via the internet, I believe there is yet another kind of evolution. We try to become our own doctors, hairdresssers, computer repairmen, plumbers, film-makers; and find more success than we have ever had before, narrowing the gap between the layman and the true professionals, who must strive to stay above it.

I'll have to admit, I want to do it all. I've tried cutting my own hair. I've stared long and hard at the tiny print on instructions manuals on how to construct your computer from scratch. I designed my own website. Through my own efforts, I edited together my showreel. I've also prescribed my own medicine.

My latest "occupation" would have to be the aspiration of becoming a novelist. I spent a little over a month creating characters and plotting their journeys with the furious fluttering of my fingers on a keyboard. Would this "novel" be deemed as true as a professional's? The truth remains to be seen, but the experience is something no one can discount.

More Than Just Recycling Paper

2009-02-25T15:03:00.000-08:00

Even though the melting in the Arctic will soon open up faster shipping routes and newly accessible sources of energy, polar bears are losing their homes and dying, sea creatures are choking from a huge swirling plastic vortex larger than the United States of America, and the North Atlantic current which carries warmth from the Equator into northern regions may die out, dropping overall temperatures drastically on both sides. Overfishing itself is causing an imbalance in the ocean's food chain and destroying ocean floors.

Nature is biting back at us. Rising mercury levels in fish are causing health problems to those who feed off them. The rising sea level has caused overflooding and threatens to destroy more homes than it already has. These are but examples of a multitude of problems caused as a result of our exploitations and careless behaviour towards the earth.

As governments and companies shift towards a more environmental focus, consumers must follow suit. Being environmentally friendly is no longer the simple act of recycling paper. It is our duty to be aware of why we need to save the earth. Finding out and eating fish that is not in danger of overfishing is one way to start. Reduce your personal trash. Things that you never thought were recyclable like shoes, bags, used CDs... can all be recycled. Take the effort to find out where to bring them, in your community. Support products with less packaging. It may be more time consuming or more costly especially with the recession in full swing, but the combined effort will make a difference.

On a smaller scale, work with reusable rather than disposable, whether it be towels, cutlery, bags, whatever you can think of. If anything, do this for our children and our children's children. Peace!

What The Shoes Know

2009-02-08T07:27:00.000-08:00

My camera isn't really great with close up shots but take a huge step back and SNAP! It does the job. The opening blog shots here were taken from my window seat on the airplane flying into New York. I had a good flight experience this time. Time seemed to fly by quickly. It must have helped that I left home at 4am without any sleep from an entire day of activity. I slept most of the way. But if you know you can't sleep on planes, then better not zombify yourself with a flight like this. Sleep in advance! My experience at the entry point into the US was not so great on the other hand. (Click on any experience for the experience).

What mattered was that I made it through and was soon on Broadway again - catching shows like "August: Osage County" (best acting on Broadway I've seen ever), "In the Heights" (backstage pictures for those with access to my NY 2009 Facebook album), "Shrek" (I won lottery tickets!), "Equus" (I saw Harry Potter naked!), "Dear Edwina" (my friend was in it) and "The Little Mermaid" (even though I had seen it before).

It was also nice noticing little differences in Manhattan like some improvements on the subway, more Wi-Fi zones, things like that. Following the demise of CompUSA, Circuit City is set to follow its footsteps. A couple of years back, Tower Records had been in that spot. (I dug up an old photo so you can make the comparison). I couldn't help but feel the impact of the recession around me.

I spent Chinese New Year in the Big Apple going back to one of my favourite haunts. I didn't know its name for years because I couldn't read the chinese characters on the shop's front and couldn't recommend it to friends. But I finally found it on the paper menu and took a picture. Another place I had been dying to go to was Serendipity - a dessert cafe made famous by the movie of the same. I'm pictured with three frozen hot chocolates, their signature drink! One can choose between the Original, Peanut Butter and Mint.

It was a great ten days spent in the city and I definitely explored it each day. My shoes would attest to that if they were still around. I bought them in the US, brought them home to Singapore and said goodbye to them back in America. My new shoes don't know half this story.

Time to Reflect

2009-01-10T05:01:00.000-08:00

"No difference" and "Same old thing" were the two thoughts in my head as New Year approached but because of where I was, I was thrown into it with a celebratory BANG! If you haven't seen it on my Facebook profile yet, here's the New Year fireworks in Singapore by the bay. I was surprised how well it was captured by my camera. Enjoy!

This year my resolution is do to my part to preserve our environment. I'm making a list of simple things we can do, so you'll be hearing from me soon about that. The first show I watched for the year was Cinderella, starring Lea Salonga at the Esplanade. I wrote more about this experience on my MySpace blog, as well as other bits of information that won't be included here.

It seems this year is starting out to be a slower year for me than the previous one. At the risk of sounding conceited - how does one top a year of leading roles in three major productions? How should I measure success anyway? But before I worry about that, I booked myself a two month vacation back to the US. New York & Florida for some sun and Disney fun! It's actually been a great few weeks of food, company and partying already - even before I've left. I've enjoyed steamboat, Lebanese cuisine, Shanghainese (pictured signature dish from One on the Bund), Peranakan and good old Christmas turkey.

I reactivated my World of Warcraft account and am now back to my old online gaming hours. I got my little gnome character, Mabina, a new hairstyle and colour. That's her flying on a gryphon (pictured above)! Yes, I don't have A life. I now have two! I also recently hosted Swatch's Spring Summer 2009 Collection Launch and since they are letting me choose a watch, I'm gonna do some endorsement here. I picked "Fine Steel" from the Age of Rust series. It's chic but casual at the same time and has really cool orange trimmings.

To Be Or Not To Be

2008-12-08T08:42:00.000-08:00

Being in "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs" has been such a wonderful learning experience for me. I auditioned for the show not thinking I was right for the Prince at all. I have Hossan Leong (our director and great friend) to thank for believing in me. It did take me a long while to be comfortable with this character through the rehearsal process. And sometimes "not getting it" can be very frustrating because I expect a lot from myself. Nonetheless, I believe I found him before the show opened. Is there room for improvement? Of course! There always is.

A week before the show opened, I fell ill and lost my voice. Having to use it every day didn't help the recovery. Up till this point, my voice hasn't fully recovered. It's not like I'm doing a terrible job but just that I hadn't been forgiving myself for not being in top form. But then I finally realised it was unhealthy thinking and past a certain point I chose to let it go and focus more on giving meaning to the songs than to sing it beautifully. After all, what's a show without heart?

The whole process from rehearsals to the stage has been so enriching. And the many hands that have gone into making the production possible have to be thanked, including Wild Rice founder, Ivan Heng, who's created such a wonderful and nurturing platform for local artists. Not forgetting the audience because without them and the energy they bring to the theatre, there would be no show.

A Different Sort of Farming

2008-10-20T09:38:00.000-07:00

As of April 2008, there were about 16 million active massively multiplayer online game subscriptions according to www.mmogchart.com. (Trivia: 10 million of those subscriptions were for World of Warcraft alone. With less than 1.5 million players, RuneScape was a distant second). With such a growing population of online gamers, it's no wonder farming gold has become huge thing. A recent article in a Singaporean newspaper featured this recent trend but did a poor job at it. Not only had they failed to define the term, they cast it in negative light.

Every online community has an economy that, like in the real world, has a currency - usually in-game gold. For obvious reasons, acquiring gold is necessary for in-game survival (the more the merrier) but it's not necessarily wrong. What's wrong is if the player acquires gold through unethical means like hacking into another account, duplicating items, etc. What's wrong in addition to that, is selling the unethically acquired items for a profit.

This is where people get confused or misunderstand. I think it's perfectly okay to sell items acquired ethically for a profit. But because of these no-good doers, the term gold farming (now intrinsically associated with exploitation) was coined and among other repercussions, eBay now doesn't allow ANY virtual property auctions to be listed. Another case of greed in human nature destroying a perfectly great way to transact.

Cos really what's the harm in paying real money for some in-game gold to improve virtual game play, especially if one doesn't have the time to hunt for gold? Likewise, if a player has more time on his hands and acquires in-game gold fairly, why can't he be allowed to sell some of it to make a real profit? The time he's put in for the hard earned gold should be worth something shouldn't it? In shaping new law to govern online behaviour, let's not forget that there's more to internet crime than "farming gold". It comes in forms of bullying, harassment and discrimation just to name a few. Perhaps an equal emphasis should be placed on solving these problems as well.

Respect For Ants

2008-10-06T09:19:00.000-07:00

Most of what I've seen on the screen about ants have been in animated features. It started with the 1984 movie, "Gallavants". It's so ancient, I couldn't even find a clip of it on YouTube. To date, there are about four ant movies I can think of - and all in the animated form. There is no shortage of documentaries about them either. After all, ants are easy to personify and are certainly not strangers to us. Then again, how well do we know them?

A recent viewing of "Ant Bully" got me thinking about these insects. As pesky as it may be, it is no mean feat for a species to find their way into our homes and adapt to living in a new environment (this concrete jungle we've created). How many other species can claim to have done that? And they are so selfless. Despite the perils attached to scouting for food, forager ants work really hard at keeping the colony fed. They use their long thin antennae to pick up on pheromone trails left by other ants and to detect food scents, which explains why they tend to follow a certain path (often times the shortest route possible). Pheromones are also used for warning purposes. That's why other ants seem to know when one ant gets crushed. An alarm pheromone is sent out.

In many ways, ants set good examples for us. Here are some clips from documentaries about ants:

So the next time you see an ant, think twice about saying goodbye to it. Say hello. If it's on my table, I usually just blow it to the ground. And don't worry about it falling to its death. Beyond a few centimeters, ants stop accelerating. This means to say, they can fall at any height and survive. Besides, they have their skeletons on the outside of their bodies. Are you an ant convert now?

F1 Singapore Grand Prix

2008-09-28T00:44:00.000-07:00

I can't help but be excited about the Grand Prix in Singapore even though my kind of sport involves playing at the video arcade, dancing in a club or lying by the pool (is that even physical?). It's hard not to feel the fever anyway with car models on display all over town and pictures of the competing drivers splashed all over the media. The funny thing about it being in Singapore is that speeding on the road is against the law. The rule is enforced strictly as with other rules. Remember Michael Fay or Flor Contemplacion? But here we are hosting an event that allows the fastest drivers in the world to burn our tar and occasionally even go against road markings.

Am I contradicting how I feel about the F1? No. I'm amused but I think it's really good for the country. It puts our name out there, brings in revenue for the country and lets the world see how beautiful and clean Singapore is while causing traffic congestion from all the roadblocks but still earning revenue from charging already inconvenienced commuters at ERP gantries. Okay, so there's good and bad. But if you think of it this way, it's really quite amusing no?

I was at Suntec City on the first day of the race and took pictures of the model route on display there. My friends and I also climbed to the roof (where there were trees?) and even though we couldn't see the action, we definitely heard it. Check out my first video embedded on my blog to hear the whizzing.

I rushed home and caught some more images off what was showing on television. I guess I can add race car driving to my list of favourite sport after all. Hey, I did learn something from it. If they can fix up a car in less than 5 seconds, there's no excuse for slow quick changes backstage anymore is there?

Too Many Faces

2008-09-17T10:10:00.000-07:00

Introducing Brian d'Arcy James. Unless you are a Broadway geek like myself you probably don't know him. But you might recognise the next picture. It's Shrek! But what if I told you that's Brian as well? It's Brian as Shrek in an upcoming musical. In order for Brian to become Shrek, he has to undergo a three hour long transformation. Luckily, work is being done to shorten that timeframe. I still don't envy him though. The results are amazing but the process is tedious! Not to mention eight shows a week.

There hasn't been a transformation in Singapore theatre that has come close, but close enough to be equally impressive. Introducing Snow White, the musical pantomime (I'm the Prince with the bunny by the way). But check out the Evil Queen. She's quite gorgeous isn't she? Or should I say, isn't HE? The next picture features an upcoming Singaporean play. One of the three actors in the poster plays the Queen. Any guesses? (Click on the picture for a closer look).

Yearbookyourself.com is taking the internet by storm as profile pictures all over Facebook slowly change from colour to black and white. I visited the website and managed to produce the picture to the left - me with an afro! I'm still recognisable though. The real question is, "Can you recognise me on the right?"

If that's not confusing enough, the restaurant I had lunch at recently sure fooled me. I was thinking I'd be in for some French cuisine as I walked into "Ma Maison" at Bugis Junction. Then, as I approached, a loud resounding voice bellowed, "Konichiwa!" If I had dog ears, they would have folded instantaneously. Alas, all I could do was think to myself, "Where the heck am I?" I looked around and realised the set up was neither French nor Japanese. Luckily the food and company were great. But what I didn't get was why they wouldn't serve my ice lemon tea beverage till after my main course. It was a drink, not dessert!

All this while, I've been discussing the many faces that aren't always what they seem. To conclude, here's a face that's less misleading - the face of the moon. I caught a beautiful shot of it at Holland Village. It didn't stay unconcealed between the clouds for long, but I caught it nonetheless. The picture doesn't do the actual view justice, but unlike the other pictures, it can be taken at face value.

Candy Travels (Nothing To Do With Madonna's Tour)

2008-09-10T02:45:00.000-07:00

I'm not one to dash to openings of new places. I have yet to visit the Southern Ridges, the 9 kilometre chain connecting four national parks in Singapore. I was also slow to visit Changi Airport's Terminal 3, but my kind secondary school friend drove me there recently. It almost felt like a new mall - clean, pretty and spacious. There was even a station where you could place paper over wooden artwork and shade the image through with a crayon. As you can see, I used more than one crayon.

I enjoyed my time there exploring shops like Candy Empire and Popeye's (first one I've seen in Singapore). I like how much more you can look into the transit area.

There were two recent McDonald's scares. One about maggots in their Curry Sauce and another about baby rats falling from the ceiling of an outlet. I thought the timing was quite uncanny because I also had my own scare with a 100 plus bottle I purchased. It's not very clear in the picture but there are black spots fused to the bottle on the inside. A series of calls led me to the Agri-Food & Veterinary Authority of Singapore. I didn't even know we had a division like this! Well done Singapore! (except for the fact that some people who worked there couldn't pronounce "veterinary"... tsk!)

While on the subject of food, here's introducing my Portable Show Candy Snack "Bar". It's never empty even though I share it with everyone around me when I'm in a production. And the best part is, none of the stuff in it is anything I've bought. Everything was a gift from someone else. How sweet isn't it? I feel so loved!

Joblessness Rocks!

2008-09-05T20:51:00.000-07:00

With "The Write Stuff" being over, I'm finally having my first taste of a break in 4 months! I have slightly more than a month of a holiday and I spent the first week catching up with friends. I even had a day I proclaimed "Random Day" where I tried to do the opposite of every impulse I got. I quite enjoyed myself ending up in different places, consuming food or drink I had never tasted before and also randomly collected a group of friends along the way.

I recently rediscovered my love for the arcade. It was nice to see that some familiar favourites were still there but also great to know that I could easily pick up the new games as well. Some of these games require a lot more physical strength, like the one in the picture to the left, "Manic Panic Ghost". It's extremely fun especially when you play with a partner. With your wand in hand, you smash the screen when ghosts appear. It's a lot trickier than one would think, but after the easy-to-understand-2-minute-instructional-portion, any one can play the game. I do worry for the screen though. There's another game where you also have to hit the screen but at a distance and with balls. Up to four players can play! How fun!

My ex-school mate from New York is in town, so we've been hanging out some. We went to "Thomas and Friends Live!" because I auditioned for it once and didn't get cast and wanted to see what the actors that did get cast could do, that I couldn't. Most actors are curious this way. In any case, the actors were probably more talented than what the show demanded for. The sets were lovely! But in terms of story, I didn't find it too engaging, but perhaps it was because it was a kids' show and it does gets hard to concentrate with the kiddies running about and screaming out loud most of the time. My friend and I were mostly interested in talking to the actors to ask if they were treated well. But we didn't get to.

Then, we headed down to the launch of the Mercedes Benz CLC Sports Coupe and schmoozed with the who's who. I don't think we ended up meeting any big guns. Everyone else was just like us... poor struggling artist. We all stood around the car and could only imagine what life would be like to own it. Okay, okay, we did take it one step further. When no one was looking, we got into the car and pretended we did own it! Poor struggling artists? Who? Us?... Nah!

The World of "The Write Stuff"

2008-08-17T03:57:00.000-07:00

The current show I'm in, "The Write Stuff" is loads of fun! We're performing 12 scripts written by 12-year-olds that are competing for the top three places. We perform a different set of plays each week but can't forget any of them because any one could end up a winner. The top three winners will be performed at the end of the show's run. It makes the whole process very exciting for us. And what's even more exciting is watching the young playwrights light up when they see their stories come to life. How many people ever get that chance anyway? The picture to the left is of Mark Wei watching "The Halloween Birthday" performed for the first time in rehearsals. (Yeah, we snack a lot while we work!)

The next cool thing I'm on to was introduced to me by my cast mates. I haven't played a role playing game (RPG) online for a long time but was recently introduced to the new table-top RPG of Dungeons and Dragons (4th edition). This is the stuff computer games are based on! I've always wanted to try my hand at this and even bought a whole set of dice but never had enough people to play with. 15 years later, the time has come! My dice can finally be initiated and I don't have to be a fake-o player anymore. I created a Tiefling character (shown in the picture) who is a Paladin. The people I play with are a lovely couple and a 9-year-old boy!

Okay! Now comes a new milestone in my life... appearing naked on national TV!! Well, I would have been completely naked if not for the pixelation. It was something I was trying to hide from everyone but there were trailers and soon the word got around. Now that I've seen the episode, where I play a scum of the earth toy boy, I guess I should take some pride in being, I think, the first naked man on local tv. This is probably the closest anyone will get to being naked on Singapore television for some time at least. For the record, I was wearing skin coloured undies!

Is Life One Big Fight?

2008-07-26T04:43:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I wish I could use magic in life's battles. My recent battles include fraudulent charges to my US bank account (and also the telecommuter who fell asleep on me while I was reporting my case - not kidding!), an unrepaired Averatec laptop I've been trying to get the lousy company to fix for over a year (and now the warranty has expired which has caused more problems!), inaccurate changes made by an unreasonable user to the content of the Wikipedia page about me (he even managed to block me, ME, from correcting his mistakes!) and a show that had standards measured up against a very different and questionable set of principles.

I'm not sure I see it in a totally negative light even though all of it combined does get me down at times. I see it as a difference I can make in the world, for myself and for others. I guess life is never free from problems whether it comes in the form of injustice, prejudice, racism or corruption. These issues have been around throughout history and will continue to be around through different circumstances in our ever-changing world. If there aren't fighters for the right causes, the world would truly be an unpleasant place to live in. Reason has many shades. Learn to look at all of them before you choose your battles! And it's fine if you don't. The world will also benefit from peace lovers =)